Miedo al éxito: ¿Qué pasará si tienes éxito?

Jean Willy Alcide Jean Willy Alcide 610 Comments Reading: 6 min

Miedo al éxito: ¿Qué pasará si tienes éxito?

 por Steve Pavlina

A veces te encuentras con un objetivo que crees que deberías querer lograr, pero simplemente no pareces estar recibiendo suficiente acción para lograrlo. Usted realmente no tiene miedo de fracaso o rechazo, el camino a la meta parece bastante claro y podría ser incluso un desafío interesante y de vez en cuando se va a hacer algún progreso. Pero la mayoría de las veces no puedes entrar en ese estado de la corriente y no estás seguro de por qué. Esto suele suceder con objetivos a largo plazo que requieren acción intermitente, como perder peso o hacer una transición para iniciar un nuevo negocio y, eventualmente, abandonar su trabajo.

Una pregunta que me pareció útil preguntar en estas situaciones es: ¿Qué pasará si tienes éxito? Olvídese de que usted espera que suceda o lo que usted teme podría suceder, pero considere realista lo que probablemente sucederá. Así que llegas a tu meta. ¿Y luego qué? ¿Qué más cambiará?

No estoy hablando de dar una respuesta superficial de 5 segundos, como "si pierdo peso, entonces seré flaco". Aparta al menos 15-30 minutos para pensar en cómo cambiará tu vida una vez que alcances tu objetivo (sin TV, radio u otras distracciones). A menudo hay efectos secundarios inesperados que usted no puede ser consciente conscientemente, pero subconscientemente pueden ser suficientes para evitar que usted pueda entrar en una acción comprometida. Por ejemplo, si pierdes mucho peso, aquí hay algunos posibles efectos secundarios: la gente se dará cuenta y comentar sobre esto, otras personas te van a pedir consejo de dieta, usted puede sentir que necesita para continuar con un cambio de estilo de vida permanente a Mantenga su peso nuevo, es posible que tenga que comprar ropa nueva, puede conseguir más atractivo para los demás y por lo tanto atraer más encuentros sociales (queridos o no deseados), los amigos preponderantes podrían ponerse celoso, su familia puede resistir sus cambios, que Puede sentir dado énfasis en si usted puede rechazar el peso, usted puede preocuparse por la pérdida de ciertos alimentos favoritos de su dieta, y así sucesivamente.

Es raro que una meta sea todas las rosas. El éxito requiere que el cambio y el cambio tengan consecuencias positivas y negativas. A menudo, como la gente afirma tener éxito en algo, la realidad es que los negativos superan el valor positivo para ellos. Pero una manera de superar este problema es conscientemente pensar en lo que son estos negativos y luego el uno por uno. Desenroscar un efecto secundario negativo podría significar entender cómo eliminar esto completamente o podría significar simplemente aceptándola y aprendiendo a vivir con ella.

Es ciertamente útil centrarse en el lado positivo de una meta. Pero no se olvide de tomar una búsqueda ocasional del lado oscuro y aceptar que usted tendrá que negociar con eso también.

El miedo al fracaso y el temor al rechazo, el temor al éxito pueden ser más insidioso porque casi siempre está inconsciente. Pero no es miedo al éxito este es el problema, pero bastante miedo de los muchos efectos secundarios exitosos de los cuales pueden ser genuinamente indeseados. Los temores que nunca se evalúan conscientemente tienen una tendencia a crecer más fuerte. La razón es el condicionamiento simple del comportamiento. Cuando usted evita algo que usted teme (consciente o subconscientemente), usted refuerza el comportamiento de la evitación automáticamente. Así que cuando usted (incluso inconscientemente) evitar correr en su objetivo debido a un miedo oculto de éxito, que en realidad refuerza el hábito de la procrastinación, por el tiempo pasa, se hace más difícil y más difícil de conseguir que en la acción. ¡Insidiosa!

Preguntando, "¿Qué pasará si tengo éxito?" puede resolver este problema porque enfoca su atención consciente en estos miedos. El miedo tiene una tendencia a encogerse bajo un examen directo, mientras que es más fácil para usted entrar en acción. Cuando digo que el miedo se contrae, otra forma de declarar esto es que el condicionamiento del comportamiento subconsciente se debilita bajo escrutinio consciente. Sé que algunas personas disgustan de la palabra "miedo" con respecto a su propio comportamiento. No está desactivado en el contenido exacto; Llame "comportamiento de evitación" Si esto es más su preferencia.

Pero un beneficio adicional es que también se pueden inventar ingeniosas soluciones de trabajo para estos conscientes del miedo, algunos de los cuales realmente pueden ser signos válidos de problemas sin resolver. Por ejemplo, volviendo al ejemplo de pérdida de peso, si pierdes mucho peso, necesitarás ropa nueva probablemente. Y si usted no tiene el dinero para comprar ropa nueva, entonces este es un problema real que usted tendrá que conducir (a menos que no le importa el uso de trajes enormes). Parte no respondida, incluso un simple problema por lo que puede ser suficiente para sabotearse subconscientemente de lograr su objetivo. Pero una vez que examinamos la situación conscientemente y entendemos una manera de lidiar con esto de antemano, usted está enviando un mensaje a su subconsciente de que no es necesario temer este problema porque usted tiene una manera práctica de resolver esto.

Ahora vamos a considerar el lado opuesto. Supongamos que usted pregunta, "¿Qué pasará si tengo éxito?" y al considerar todos los efectos secundarios, se da cuenta de que no desea lograr la meta nada de hecho. Los negativos superan los valores positivos. Encontré esto cuando hice un plan para cultivar mi negocio de juego pero no parecía hacer tanto progreso como yo quería. Cuando pregunto esta pregunta mágica, me di cuenta de que realmente no quería llegar a la meta con todos sus efectos secundarios. Lo que realmente quería era la transición para escribir y hablar a tiempo completo, y seguir construyendo mi negocio de juegos me llevaría más lejos, de hecho, de ese objetivo más importante. Cultivar mi negocio de juego parecía un objetivo que debería desear, pero cuando realmente pensaba en eso donde estaría si alcanzaba ese objetivo, me di cuenta de que no sería el éxito que realmente quería. Fue un logro difícil para mí. Reconozca que mi escalera de mano exitosa original estaba apoyando ahora contra el edificio equivocado. Así que en realidad tuve el "unset" ese objetivo una vez que realmente entendía las consecuencias probables de lograr esto.

Incluso ahora ya que he establecido metas en la dirección de la escritura y hablando como mi nueva carrera, reconozco que hay grandes efectos secundarios. No tengo el ancho de la banda mental simplemente para dos carreras de tiempo completo. Uno de los efectos secundarios más duros para mí era dejar ir de los objetivos y los sueños que tenía para mi negocio de juegos. Todas estas ideas creativas para nuevos juegos que nunca serán. Y los jugadores que quieran ser quienes nunca los experimentarán.. Pero esto se supera en valor para lo que sucederá a medida que tengo éxito en mi nueva carrera. Crear un nuevo juego que desafía, entretiene y exalta a la gente es maravilloso; Sin embargo, ser capaz de ayudar a la gente crece, me satisface aún más. Encontré esto el mismo proceso iluminando revisando todos estos efectos secundarios y uno por uno reconoce que los acepto.

¿Qué pasa si tienes éxito? Si pierdes peso. Adquiera la fecha. Gana la promoción. Inicie el negocio. Quedar embarazada. Deja a Fumage. Conviértete en millonario. ¿El estire?

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About the Author

Jean Willy Alcide
Jean Willy Alcide

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